The Down And Dirty Of Motherhood

Have you ever had just one of those days? I try to keep lighthearted most of the time on this blog but gosh, sometimes I have a really bad day. Thus my story begins at the grocery store this past Tuesday. Thankfully it wasn’t busy because the kids were like crazed flying monkeys, running everywhere…including, unfortunately, into other shoppers.

“I’m sorry” and “excuse me” were the words I muttered constantly to the people who were there in the store. I gave death glares to the kids and did the angry snap and point gesture with my fingers. Often.

It got so bad that while I was at the register I sat all the kids down on their butts and told them to sit there on the floor! Then, while trying to swipe my debit card, I looked over and saw them all with a magazine on their laps pulling out all the inserts.

Next, we went to the post office. While I was mailing my package, the kids were playing store with all the shipping labels. “How much do you need?” asked one. Then another would say, “Eleven”. Then the first would grab a stack from the bin and toss them over. Packing slips scattered all over the floor. I picked them all up, put them back in the correct bins and sat the kids again on their butts right by my feet. Olivia scooted over sitting right in front of the office door, preventing an employee from getting through.

On the way home Wade starts whining about his hat being wet. I found out Luke shook his juice cup over his head. I usually always “step in” on issues like this and do my mothering thing but this time I didn’t even respond. Ignoring the kids can fun sometimes – you should try it. It makes them really mad.

At home, the house was a wreck and I demanded the kids to start cleaning up. It seemed like the more they cleaned up the messier the house became. Does this happen to you?

I went upstairs to check their rooms. They didn’t put anything away, but just shoved it all under the beds. So I pulled everything out and told them to do it again, and this time actually clean it up!  The second “room check” resulted in me seeing hangers and trash and girl toys shoved in the boys’ toy baskets. Oh, and a shoe. But not the shoe I have been looking for. Liv has three pairs of summer shoes and each set is missing one. So I have three solitary shoes with no match.

Then Zoe brings me her brand new doll stroller I bought for her birthday TWO days ago, and it is broken. One of the boys did it. That’s all I know.

You really want my life right now, don’t you?

All of this makes me want to send a nasty letter to all the furniture stores that show pristine children’s rooms all perfect and beautiful. You know the ones…where even the stuffed animals and toys match the color scheme?

NOT my kid’s room

You want to see a real kid’s room? Look at mine. A real kids room is a mismatched hodge podge of colored toys and small pieces of this and that thrown all over the floor. Which completely clashes with any attempt at a décor color scheme I was going for. There is a wrinkled up bedspread and pillows on the floor. A sock is in the corner. No, make that 5 socks and a tennis shoe. A real kid’s room has scuff marks on the wall where they rolled their cars up and down. A real kids room has a pillow case with white marks from their toothpaste because they drooled during the night. A real kids room has broken toys jumbled up with the good ones. A real kids’ room is just a jumbled up chaotic mess.

But that is not what sells bedspreads is it?

This could totally be my kid’s room. If it wasn’t a cartoon and all.